happy birthday!!!

today is my brother's birthday and im not with im on his big day. he turns 15 today but i still see him as a little brother i use to play and laugh with in those old days :) he is the third child among us four and our gap is quite far, which was 7 years. when my mom was still carrying him in the womb, i use to talk with him. like putting my lips at our mom's bulging belly and just talk to him like he hears every word what im saying. once my mom took me to the clinic for her baby check, and my mom put my hands at her tummy and i could feel him kicking. i use to be the rebellious lazy child and i came worse when he was delivered. i felt that my parents no longer wants me and even my sister was keen to him than me. but i didn't hated him,i do loved him but i dont know why im so bad with him. HAHA! i once threw a stone and hit his forehead but he didn't cry,i was always the one scolding him and calling him names, but once i was far from him i do really miss him. maybe back days I didn't know how my stupid attitude could affect my lil' brothers but now i know that my stupidity made me feel sorry for myself. but, i thank God for giving me such beautiful siblings that they never turned me down. from the day my parents divorced, i had promised my self not to let them suffer like me and my sister did. and i think I kept that promise :) He,as the first son of the family was strong,independent and at a very young age he thinks like a grown up and acts like one and for that, i am really proud of it.
Dear euan, I hope that you could be a good guy when u get older and enjoy ur birthday. be a teenager as others do, don't just fall to much. but i know, u learn from ur mistakes. u never gave up for me and ur such a wonderful little brother. thank you for being such a protector for the family...happy birthday brother,,,i love u so much :)